Can you describe the moment you found out you were going to be a mother? What were your initial thoughts and feelings?
I found out I was pregnant the day before travelling to Belgium, my home country, to celebrate Christmas with my family. We had to keep this tremendous news all to ourselves because it was too soon to tell anyone. My husband and I were recently married and we were not really planning on having a baby so fast (2 months after our civil wedding). We were still thinking about organising a religious and African wedding but with this new arrival in our family everything had to be paused. I remember that I felt a mix of emotions: joy, fear, excitement, and a great sense of responsibility. I have always wanted to have kids but when it happened, I have to admit that I was not ready for the road, even though it was something I desired for so long.
What has been the most surprising thing about motherhood for you?
Motherhood is an everyday adventure which comes with so many different surprises. I think that the most surprising one is the overwhelming love that one can have and feel towards another human being. It’s a type of love I never experienced before: unconditional, protective, honest. It’s a feeling that is so strong and seriously I didn’t know I could love someone that much in my life. It sounds cheesy but I can’t explain it in any other way.
When I learnt that I was pregnant, I remember feeling a mix of emotions: joy, fear, excitement, and a great sense of responsibility.
And what is the challenge of motherhood that nobody told you about before?
I think that one of my biggest challenges as a first time mother was to accept the physical changes after the pregnancy. No one really told me about the postpartum period and recovery. I had a lot of expectations about the birth and asked a lot about it around me but I never really thought of the physical impact after the baby is born. It was a bit of a challenge but I am happy my own mother came around to give us a hand during the first days at home.
What has been the most rewarding aspect of raising Yoah?
I think like every parent, the most rewarding aspect of raising a child is to see him grow up in good health and witness all his small milestones. I can’t tell you the joy it was when he started rolling over his tummy, crawling, walking, saying funny words in French, English and Spanish, eating with a spoon, drinking water by himself… Each developing step is just so cool to watch. We don’t want to wish time away but we are eager to see many more.
Do you have any small rituals with Yoah?
Yes, before going to bed, we have this little ritual: I bathe him, brush his teeth, put his pyjama on, he then goes out the room to kiss his daddy goodnight, comes back running in the bedroom, turns out the light by himself, asks me to lift him up on the bed, picks up his little blanket and waits to be breastfed, with a lot of excitement in his eyes. Then we just lay down next to each other until he falls asleep. Every night, it’s the same thing and we both love this moment where we wind down from the busy day (at the nursery for him and at work for me). I also take a chance to pray over him when we lay down and whisper positive things for his life.
You’re, among many other things, a singer. Da you somehow incorporate creativity and your personal interests into parenting?
Yes, definitely! We love to incorporate creative activities in our everyday routine. I love to sing and dance so I always try to make Yoah join me in my music moments! He actually really likes to shout and dance in his own cute ways. We have already recorded some pretty funny videos! Steph, my husband, skates and has already taught him how to kickflip! He still has some way to go though… I think it’s important to make him participate in the fun things we do, it opens his mind and will help with his own creativity.
How do you find time for yourself, and what do you do to take care for yourself?
Well, I have to admit that this is still something I need to find for myself… Some “me-time”! With my husband we try to have one day during the weekend where we do our own things. It’s not always easy though. What I usually do to take care of myself in this season of my life is to try to wake up earlier than I used to so I have an hour and half to meditate, pray, read, stretch and exercise, in the early hours of the day when the house is silent… Until… I hear the little footsteps of Yoah and the loud “Mama tete” which is his call for a morning feed.
What would you wish to other mothers for Mother’s Day?
I wish other mums to be strong, patient, kind and loving to their kids and to celebrate this gift of motherhood. Huge respect to all the mamas out there that have gone through pregnancy, labour, birth, sleepless nights, postpartums, and many more awesome things! It’s a hard but beautiful journey and it’s worth it! Happy Mother's Day!
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